WebQuest

Ok, so…I’ll admit—of all the apocalypses, nuclear war is the least interesting to me. It’s…preventable. It involves heroic, over-muscled dudes and bad-ass-but-sexy women fighting to save the world. It’s preventable.

It may say something about me that I only get interested in the apocalypses we can’t do anything about. The surprise ones. Those are the more interesting stories, those produce the feeling of being trapped and helplessness that really make me sit up and pay attention.

No, I don’t really get it either.

So. First Link:

http://nuclearholocaust.blogspot.com/

….er…I’m not sure exactly what this blog is…blogging about. It appears to be…music links? Death Metal/Thrash Metal.

Yeah. Let’s try something else.

First Link #2

Ahh…this looks promising.

Nuclear Holocaust 2010? 2011? 2012? - Steelmark Online Forum
http://www.websitetoolbox.com/tool/post/steelmark/vpost?id=1601429
3 posts - 3 authors - Last post: Jan 28, 2008

“Satchi,in answer to your fear of nuclear holocaust,NO CHANCE. Certain circumstances are in place,have no fear,it wont come to anything, ...” [sic]

I love crazy forums.

…damn. There appears to be no more end-of-of-the-world posts.

…aaaand…no links. Damn.

Ok, Next Link!

Clueless About Nuclear Holocaust - Council on Foreign Relations
www.cfr.org/publication/4607/clueless_about_nuclear_holocaust.html - 25k -

ahh, religion and nuclear weapons.

“On Buddha's birthday in 1998, there was national jubilation when India conducted nuclear tests. Hindu extremists suggested that the radioactive desert sands in which the tests had been conducted be distributed across the nation.”
I…really have nothing to add to that. That’s awesome. Man, religious crazies in the US would be SO much more fun if we got the Hindu gods, myth cycle, and magic.

Anyway, the rest of the article is talking about how the Hindi people are so simple and naïve they don’t realize what a danger nuclear weapons are. This is evidenced by the fact that they really wanna blow up Pakistan, and think that the US (after India launches nukes at Pakistan mind you) will disarm Pakistan. ‘Cause the US hates Pakistan as much as India does, of course. Wow. Just…wow. Racism is fun folks!

But…following the linky, the linky, the liiinkyyy…

India, Pakistan, Arms Control and Disarmament
http://www.cfr.org/issue/52/arms_control_and_disarmament.html

hmm…we have a choice between Iran and North Korea.

Oh. Going with the crazy dictator ANYTIME over the current events.

Awww…that was boring. Just talking about Hillary Clinton’s visit to S. Korea, where they are (understandably) worried that North Koreas crazy dictator will blow them to kingdom come.

Bah. This site is boring. Onward to a different site.

Rick Astley Survived the Wasteland
When Rick said he'd never let you down, Not even Nuclear Holocaust/Raiders/Slavers/Mutated Insects could stop him. Thanks to...
www.wegame.com/watch/Rick_Astley_Survived_the_Bombs/ - 78k –

Hahaha. There are a significant number of Rick Astley hits from nuclear war-related searches. I’ve just been rickrolled. I don’t know why. This link was Rick Astley as a Fallout 3 guy, dancing in the middle of nuclear winter.

Okay. Next!

U.S. Drafts 'Day After' Plan for Nuclear Holocaust
www.secretsofsurvival.com/survival/day_after_nuclear_holocaust.html - 31k -

Hokay: oooh. Blinding colors? Check. American flag with “The Bible” superimposed over it? Check. Crazy Conspiracy? Double Check. Ahhhh…this is more like it.

Hmm…this article is a little old. Lets look for a more recent one—

Hahahahahahaahhahahaha

“If USA Falls to 'Nuclear Jihad', Escape to Canadian / Alaska Wilderness –
Here are three places to cross into Canada / flee for Alaska if Islamic Holy War is finally unleashed on America”

That is one hell of an awesome headline.

What are these places?

Well….they don’t really say. But here’s a bit of where they kinda talk about it…

“If you fall short of God's demands for Holiness, and you're 'left behind', where will you go?

If you live up north, will you escape to Canada and head in the direction of Alaska (depending on your present location)?

Oh yeah, and since terrorists will no doubt be waiting for such measures, we're not talking about escaping the country by road or car.

We're talking about journeying through the wilderness via hiking trails, railroad tracks, and forest service roads.”

Racism, check, check and check. Links to World News Daily, check!. WND articles talking about the “Messianic madness of nuclear Osama”

Oh man. Wow.

Ohoh! For us Minnesotans!

“Central United States Escape Route to Canadian Wilderness

Height of Land Portage: If you live in Minnesota, you likely know of this place. If not, then here's the skinny.

The Height of Land Portage is a portage along the Boundary Waters route between Canada and the United States (portage refers to the practice of carrying a boat or other water vehicle over land to avoid an obstacle in the water). Specifically, the Height of Land Portage can be found along the boundary between Minnesota and Canada.”

“…the Height of Land Portage provides relatively easy thoroughfare and has everything you need- water, wilderness shelter, various food sources, and isolation- to survive if the country were to become under attack (better dress for the cold, though). Further, invading forces are not likely to want to end up there as they will find no people.

Unless enough people read this article, that is.”

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. No fear of that, my friends. No fear of that.

And…then they talk about grizzlies being a problem.

Ok, so we’ve got Racism, conspiracies, Religious Rants about the “end times”, scary Russians, and the fear of Bears. All wrapped up in an awesome nuclear sandwich. Yup. I’m done. My work here is finished.